The Problem With Change

Change is not that good

Source –

Change is a good thing, may be, the best of things. But is it redemption? It’s too early to tell.

Supposedly, we are required to come out of our comfort zone but it’s not that simple. Some introspection is required regarding why should we strive for things beyond our comfort zone?

Continue reading

New Job Update – Painful Decisions

Most of my posts are a way to deal with the negative in my life, and these quite aptly reflect the kind of person I am – mostly inclined towards the pessimistic side. I am trying to toy around with the few things but at the core, it’s hard to change who I am. This is one such post – even though there is some light and momentum in my life, it’s the empty half that is pinching me badly.

I’ll start off with the good news – I’ve given up my job at the present firm and relocating to a better back office job. Yeah, no front end masala in my life as yet but it is a significant improvement nonetheless.

Now, the other aspect – I would have to move to another city, a costlier city and there is no salary increase. Hence, it pinches. To add insult to injury, I was not the first choice for this role. Some IIM guy was and he rejected it due to low salary and perks. I had made up my mind on rejecting this offer but then my ego caved in. It felt like chewing glass while making this compromise but I guess it’s a price I need to pay.

But I wonder if it’s healthy in the long i.e. to hire a person like me under such circumstances. I am setting foot in a very despicable state of mind, feeling cheated and belittled. I am trying my best to look at the glass half full but it’s not working for now. If the actual work does not turn out to be like the way I have imagined it to be, it would really become a very stinky hole to breathe in. However, the chances for the role to be worse than the present one are quite rare, – given the low bar set in the past.

There are some explicit benefits also – I get more security with this new role, a better platform, a bigger brand name wherein I can launch my career into a plethora of directions in the future. Also, it’s a generic role and will involve learning new skills and stuff. So, that’s exciting.

Some other random stuff….

The salary negotiation process was very uncomfortable as I was doing it for the first time. I had a feeling that HR tried her best as I did reject the first offer they sent. If I had a good job profile, I might have negotiated more acutely. Rejecting it a second time seemed a bit a risky and I never fancied my luck on that. Even the solitary quip by HR – Congratulations and welcome to *#$#@(%(%( drew no reaction from me. I was more focused on controlling my tongue than letting any elation seep in, which was, well, atrophied by the final figure that the HR quoted.

Leaving a set life behind is not easy either, all your friends, the stability and laziness. I guess it’s a new journey and I am feeling the growing pains. I hope I am able to keep my ego in check and get the best out of this opportunity. Till next time…

The Illusion of Hard Work – Part II


Credits –

I was just reading the previous article with the same heading over here. During the read, some more questions popped up in my mind which needed further analysis. Among the various questions at hand, the one that troubled me the most was this one – Have I been running away from challenges my entire life? I mean, if I could not find any particular area wherein I have worked really hard and achieved something, then surely, something is definitely wrong.

Continue reading

My Doubts on Creating this Blog

The onset of this blog is quite haphazard and makes we wonder as to how little I think before venturing into something and at the same time how good a guide raw intuition is. I wanted to do something like this, but didn’t know what exactly. I thought I would copy farnamstreet and probably create something similar.

Without surprise, that plan backfired big time. Personally, copying others is not really a healthy conduit for my own creativity. While borrowing ideas from others is very common, setting up the soul of your work similar to someone else is definitely not sustainable in the long run.

With every action carrying so much weight, it becomes imperative to lay out a certain structure for the entire process. Not only does it involve money and my limited mental energy, it also saps the most precious resource i.e. time. Hence, let’s focus our energy on the same.

I am not sure as to how exactly I want this blog to look in the near future but I want it as a platform that would allow me to put my random thoughts into a concrete form. And while I am at it, churning out something useful for people in the same boat is definitely not a bad idea. Some things like Tax, Investments, job search, interview prep can be quite useful really. Let’s see how this pans out. I’m pretty sure there are quite a few keywords I can potentially target with this kind of a setup. There is lots of work to be done, let’s wait and watch.

On the monetization part of it, as long as I don’t have to spend money while maintaining it, I am good with it. My other website compensates for this pursuit and will hopefully continue to do the same till this one starts paying for itself.

I am not really sure if I would love to pay for this from my own pocket really if I were not earning anything in return. The maintenance is roughly $125 per year, which is not too small an amount for me as of this stage of my life. With some trickery, I can take it down to $40 roughly but that soaks up a lot of my time. Still early days for this setup actually.

If I break it down even further, I would need to spend roughly $10 per month (at worse) to keep this thing floating. I think I can do that from my own pocket too in the long run. Not that bad really. It would all depend on my motivation level and how I plan to play this forward. Chow chow till then.

The Illusion of Hard Work


Credits –

Somewhere down the line during my upbringing, things got messed up – by me, of course. The things that I did, most of them, did not involve too much of hard work. At least by my bandwidth standards, I definitely was not uncomfortable during most situations. Even if there was a task I was not able to learn like swimming for example, eventually, I was able to accomplish it without much rigorous effort. Just like that!

Continue reading

The Thin Membrane between Intuition and Acquired Knowledge


Photo Credits –

I think I got it from my mother, I saw her doing it often – trying to make guesstimates about things that you she knew nothing about based on things that she did know about. More often than not, these deductions were pretty logical, consistent and followed a good linear thought.

The problem is - it’s hard to be right in such a scenario, consistently (even remotely). 

Continue reading

Reflecting on Staying Quiet Conundrum

Photo Credits –

There is a big problem with me at times – I just can’t speak up in certain situations. I get a brain freeze and don’t know how to react. Weird assumptions guide me, assumptions that exist only inside my mind and have no practical side to it. It seems a bit arcane as I try to imagine the scenario really but most of the times I am afraid – afraid of being judged, of being labelled with an opinion or of getting in an argument.

Continue reading